2019-04-26 · Poetry
I'm not perfect nor do I pretend to be but I tend to be someone striving to be a better friend, a better son, and a better human being. It's no easy task getting to know one's self on such a deep and personal level. I'm just trying to make the world go round some salvation found and all my love abound. I'm scared now as I'm unlikely to be, unlikely to see, and unlikely to plea for a better chance to remember how enlightened I feel in the here and now in the then and there and my when and where. As Twain put it, it's curious how often one's schooling can get in the way of one's education. Real learning - whatever that means. The future - gosh how it seems to be so much like the past we all get past to get somewhere sometime somehow. It's not always as we intended our present to be present as we present the people we've become and the sadness we've overcome to get to be ourselves along the way. Why do we all so hastily sacrifice our bliss, our peace, and our love today for the potential for maybe more tomorrow? Money can buy some happiness, but at the cost of more expensive problems. I've never been able to purchase any additional time in my life. What a precious resource we so quickly sacrifice for doing things we don't always enjoy to impress people we don't always like for reasons we don't necessarily understand. I long for the way the sunny days feel as my soul starts to heal from the storms and the mist, the reign of the rain and the fog of the clouds. It's within my spirit and within my heart whether I'm ready for weather or instead ready for shelter. If you can, I hope you'll want to start to begin to understand that this is my story and this is my life. My body is my vessel, my mind my mouthpiece for orchestrating my life's work. Take me as I am in this moment, staring through my wardrobe, my hair there, skin bare, memories that layer the essence of my being. I live beneath it and the smiles and tears I feel in the way. All those thoughts and feelings and dealings and struggle. Yeah, I'm by no means perfect, but the one thing I am is true and sincere that all my fear and those I hold most dear will help me appear in all that I do and all that I am wherever that will take me. Yes, I said wherever that will take me knowing full well that sometimes both my angels and demons will take the wheel as I continue to grow and become my own man. That journey includes so much failure to come and so much disappointment to endure, but I know I'm on my way. Head down gloves up gives me my best possible chance of being perfectly satisfied and happy in this life: a truer kind of perfection in my book.